I know I spend too much time on social media. Even with trying to fast from it on Sundays as part of my Sabbath practice, I recognize the damage of prolonged exposure. Like stepping into a swiftly moving river I am both swept up in its current and can feel it eroding the banks of my soul.
Now, I’m not one of those people who think of the internet, or even specifically social media, as a terrible thing. Years ago I was challenged by a speaker who threw out, off-the-cuff, “What if we saw every advancement in technology as a new opportunity for God to send forth His word?” I do see that. I have made relationships with people and found community online, many of whom have transitioned into friends in real life as well. Without the reach of cyberspace many of my words would stay stuck up in my head, never getting to do the ministry for which I hope they’re intended.
I think that’s positive thing. Maybe not, but I sure hope so.
And yet, I feel the erosion. The longings which simmer on back burners bubble over and burn as I scroll.
Look! Another new women’s conference I wish I was a part of.
Look! Another friend has signed a publishing contract.
Look! A trip to a faraway place I dream of seeing someday.
Look! A beautiful Instagram account of encouraging trendy Christian women. (Wait, why do they all look the same? When did that happen? Did we just replace dowdy overalls and craft necklaces with the other end of the spectrum? Weird.)
And just when I feel I can’t take it anymore (why am I still scrolling?!) a still, small voice says:
BEHOLD!
The word in its original form is horáō. To behold is to go beyond looking. Metaphorically it’s to see with the mind; to see spiritually, to perceive inwardly, to experience.
“Behold, I am coming quickly, and My reward is with Me, to render to every man according to what he has done.” (Rev. 22:12)
“Behold, the LORD has proclaimed to the end of the earth: Say to the daughter of Zion, ‘Behold, your salvation comes; behold, his reward is with him, and his recompense before him.’” (Isaiah 62:11)
“Working together with him, then, we appeal to you not to receive the grace of God in vain. For he says, ‘In a favorable time I listened to you, and in a day of salvation I have helped you.’ Behold, now is the favorable time; behold, now is the day of salvation.” (2 Cor. 6:1-2)
“We are treated as impostors, and yet are true; as unknown, and yet well known; as dying, and behold, we live; as punished, and yet not killed; as sorrowful, yet always rejoicing; as poor, yet making many rich; as having nothing, yet possessing everything.” (2 Cor. 6:8-10)
Behold! We are not to receive this grace and go on with our lives as if nothing is different. He is coming and what we do now matters. Even though we feel unknown sinking in cybernetic space we are well known by Him. Even if it looks like we are dying and our influence is shrinking, behold, we can live and flourish in the kingdom now.
The point of all this is not to end up Christian-famous.
I do not know if all my bubbling desires will be fulfilled here. I am not given that guarantee. But when I behold the excellencies of Him who called me out of the darkness and into His marvelous light all is put in perspective. When I behold I am put to peace.
Now is the favorable time. It’s time to lay down the phone and my scrolling desires, and, behold all He can accomplish in me and through me with a lifetime dedicated to doing small things with great love.
image credit: Startup Stock Photos
You just oh so poetically said what I have been thinking about for weeks now, when does the scrolling stop and the living start? Ugh, still searching for that answer. I guess I’m finding it to be a much more gradual process than I think it will be, but grateful for the small indications of change and growth I can see, or rather “behold.!”
It’s so hard, isn’t it? I’m spending advent doing some reflecting on the question you posed about when does the living start. I need discernment.